“Blessed is the man whose strength is in You, Whose heart is set on pilgrimage.”
This song came out of meditation on Psalm 84 while going through a personal search for more of God. It started by meditating on how small I am, and how big God is. I found myself in a time of overwhelming stress and responsibilities, and facing my weaknesses and lack of ability to navigate though the mounds of work, responsibilities, and pressures I was feeling. I remember the day, I was driving and I looked at the sky and saw the clouds and began to imagine myself sailing away with the Lord, He just carried me away in that moment. And I asked the Lord, “If I had no worries on my mind, if I could just disappear for a day into Your world, fully, I mean, no thoughts of my own, fully engaged only with His world up there, what would it be like?” How deep are His depths?
That meditation would last for two years, and evolve into multiple songs, visions, and scriptures being written on my heart, like Psalm 84:5.
I saw myself sailing, putting up the sail, alone in the boat, but I could feel the presence of the Lord in the breeze across the water. It was a breeze I felt before, when I was in prayer in the very first prayer room in Roseville, a warm breeze that was out of place. It wasn’t summer, it was only march, but a deposit of summer came in through the back door, a warm breeze that didn’t quite belong in that season, but was heaven’s kiss to me. It was a reminder, “you are not alone”, “I am right here with you, and I am so glad you’re here.” Quiet, warm, satisfying, pleasure of the Lord. Have you ever felt that before? I will never forget that day. That’s the day I knew that God was with me. I go back to that moment often when I can’t feel God’s presence, and I remember that moment, and it takes me right back, my Emmanuel moment. So, here I am...
I am in the boat.
I feel the soft breeze. I look at the waters ahead, and it is very low fog, almost like clouds in front of me. The clouds get thicker. Pretty soon, I cannot see in front of me anymore. The excitement kicks in even more because it’s a ride I have gotten on, and there is no getting off of it. If I turned back I wouldn’t know what direction to go, I am surrounded. I have no choice but to leave my worries, my anxieties, my stress, all behind and trust the Lord. The Lord is saying, “you wanted to spend a day just with me”, “now there is nothing else to distract you”. Oh, if I could only describe that encounter to you in a way that you could taste and feel.
No land in sight.
I look up, no land in sight, and now I realize I am sailing in the skies, in the clouds, the Lord took me up. He took me high above the cares, the worries, all the temporal elements. It’s exhilarating, and scary all at the same time. The Lord begins to teach me. He reminds me of how He called me to go to Mt. Zion, and how when I got there I was surprised that I didn’t have to hike a mountain. Suddenly, the top was not the destination.
He begins to show me what “Journeying to Zion” means, and my heart is humbled. He shows me that the "Journey" has never been a destination. He brought me to those places so that we could talk along the way, so He could show me things and we could have exchange. The pilgrimage, into His heart. My continued “yes”, brings me out of the all-consuming compulsions of my world, and into His.
I truly hope you enjoy this song and it ministers to you as it has been to me.